Dec
19

gratitude

I know I’ve been absent around here lately.  That wasn’t my intention.  I honestly hoped to be blogging a lot more in December, with holiday festivities and catching up.  But alas, today is the 19th; Christmas is right around the corner!  Then the new year will begin and we’ll tuck this one away.  Man, it seems like time is going by faster and faster!

I can’t promise much more blogging before 2013.  In the next week and a half my sister will get married, Christmas Eve and Christmas will take place, there’ll be another wedding in our family on the 27th and we’ll start the new year!  It’s going to be a whirlwind!  In the meantime, we are finishing up Christmas present making and trying to enjoy this sweet time of the year :)

I did just want to take a minute and write though.  The last couple of blog posts were really heavy and I know I left some blanks to be filled.  I was honestly just getting down my thoughts, sharing where I was.  Thank you to those of you who texted and messaged with concern. For anyone wondering what was going on around here, Branden was let go from his job a week and a half ago.  It wasn’t completely unexpected as the company he was working for has been struggling for some time now, but it still hit us pretty hard.  I feel like there’s so much going on right now, a lot of difficult things.  So many things in the lives of those around us that make our situation seem completely bearable.

I have to say that when we first found out about Branden’s job, I had a couple really hard days (hence the heavy blog posts :)  I wondered what the Lord was doing.  (I’m still kind of wondering)  We find ourselves in a place where the Lord, because of His faithfulness, has to show up.  He must because He promises to take care of us.  But I had my doubts.  How would He take care of us?  Not like, “how could He possibly do it?” but I truly wondered “how?”  In what unexpected ways would He provide and teach and bring us through?

I have recently been surprised, and humbled.  In the week and a half since Branden has been home, there’s been an incredible outpouring on our family.  People in our lives have been coming to us, blessing us in so many ways, ways that are providing for our needs.  Prayer and groceries and gift cards and so much more!  It truly has been amazing, and so incredibly sweet.

Last Sunday, a lady that we serve with at church pulled me aside.  She started crying before she could speak (which meant I was crying too!)  She said she had been talking with the Lord about us and that He told her she could give us a gift.  She said it wasn’t much and placed a folded bill in my hand.  Her love for us was great, she said, because it was the Lord’s love.  “He’s thinking about you,” she told me though her tears.

And so even in the unknown, I am full of gratitude tonight.  Not just for the provision of our physical needs (though that is amazing enough!) but that the Lord is using His people, His sweet church to surround us and bless us so abundantly in this season.  I am blown away at their kindness, at their generosity.

I can hear the Lord now, saying as He did to the disciples after a miracle, “Oh you of little faith, why did you doubt?”  His voice gentle, I find myself speechless.  Why do I doubt Him?  He has truly only been faithful.  There are still a lot of unknowns right now, but I’m finding there is peace as I set my heart only on Him.  He is good and He is faithful.  It’s who He is; He can be nothing else.  In the face of uncertainty, I can put my trust in Him.

And with that, I’ll end this post.  Merry Christmas to you if I don’t get a chance to post before then!  This Christmas will be different for sure, and one to remember.  I am looking forward to it!

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